This whole year, I’ve been going as hard as I can, seemingly in the dark, weathering a storm and not knowing where I’m going. I’m mostly doing this on my own, with some help from others, but it looks like I’m getting where I need to go. My church has helped me with that. Amazingly, I had a run exactly like that yesterday.
Real quick, in case you’ve never been here, I’m a father of three and a marathon runner. My middle child, 7-year-old Jack, is severely autistic. I broke my neck when I was 16 and I’ve always been grateful that I wasn’t paralyzed. My legs are a gift, and after I started running (and running fairly well) after I turned 30, I decided I want to use that gift to try to make a difference. So, I’m attempting to run 61 full marathons this year to try to raise awareness and money for Train 4 Autism.
I feel like I was led down this path and while I’ve have had frequent emotional struggles with this endeavor, I always try my best to maintain my faith and remember that I’m doing what I’m supposed to be doing and I need to stay strong. I’m through 51 of the races so far. Still on target!
That being said, I had an interesting adventure on my run yesterday, and it seemed like it was my entire year all rolled up into an early-morning workout. So, I’ll break it down to show how it paralleled my year.
I’ve been going as hard as I can
I set out to run nine miles yesterday morning. I’ve had two training runs over the past seven weeks and they’ve both been pretty slow. For me, that means around 8:30 per mile. But I wanted to push it. I wanted to tackle a bigger hill than I normally run on and I wanted to average quicker than 8:00 per mile. Just two days off my 51st marathon of the year, I knew I’d have to push. But that’s what I wanted to do. I wanted to run hard. I wanted a good workout.
When I go out for a six-miler, I usually have climbs of 100, 200 and 300 feet. This nine-mile course had climbs of 100, 300 and 560 feet. I was looking at a tough run and I was excited about it. I really wanted to push myself.
Seemingly In The Dark, Weathering A Storm
It was dark outside. Very dark. I don’t run with a headlamp because I know where I’m going. I take the same path, I run on sidewalks and I can see well enough by the stars and some street lights. I trip while running maybe once a year. I wear a white sleeveless tank so cars can see me. I take care to be safe. But it’s not a huge issue, because I run on quiet streets and I ONLY run on sidewalks.
As for the storm part, it was raining yesterday morning. I love running in the rain. Not only do I find it refreshing, but when I’m out there, I realize that toughing it out is why I get to go to Boston. I love the feeling of battling it out in the rain!
And Not Knowing Where I’m Going
Here’s the key part of what happened. I finished the 560-foot climb and it’s pretty simple to get there. It’s basically a mile up a hill on a street I’m very familiar with, followed by a left turn at a light and then a mile up another hill on a street. It’s a straight shot, no turning. I hit 4.5 miles and turned around to head back.
I started running down the hill and stayed on the street I went up. All of a sudden, though, there was no sidewalk. That was odd, because there’s a sidewalk on that street. I hit the light and made the right turn and could see lights off in the distance that I presumed were a small shopping center at the base of that hill. I was perplexed about the sidewalk issue, but I just kept going back down the hill I came up.
About a quarter mile later, the sidewalk cut off into a trail. It was pitch black and raining and I could barely see anything. There’s an area right there called Whiting Ranch that has a lot of mountain lions, so after about 100 yards when the trail got deeper and deeper into the wilderness area, I turned back because I suspected I was lost. It was pitch black and I couldn’t see a thing. And of course, I did NOT want to become a midnight snack for a mountain lion. I was somewhat scared at this point.
I’m Mostly Doing This On My Own
When I got back to the top of that trail, I continued back down the street I had turned onto. I was pretty sure I was in the wrong place, because there was no sidewalk. I ran as far to the right as possible because I didn’t want to get hit by any cars that might come by. It was as dark as it gets, I was soaking wet, and there was nobody anywhere. Occasionally, a car flew by. And when I say flew, I mean I passed a 55 mph speed limit sign. I passed through a road called Glen Ranch. I thought I was on Glen Ranch. So that confirmed I was lost. I had absolutely no idea where I was, and I was looking back to try to determine whether or not I was going in the right direction. I knew if I was more than 10 minutes late, my wife would worry.
So, I started booking. I was fatigued from the big hill and the marathon two days prior, but I turned three miles in a row along that dark, dangerous, rainy road at paces between 6:53 and 7:04. I had no clue where I was, but I just kept rolling, optimistic I’d find my way.
With Some Help From Others, But It Looks LIke I’m Getting Where I Need To Go
Eventually, I came upon a car that was parked on the shoulder and I asked a man in there where I was. I had no clue! He told me I was on El Toro Road, heading west. So I was pretty confident I knew where I was. I just didn’t know how far east I was. So I kept going.
My Church Has Helped Me With That
I didn’t recognize anything, but about a mile later, I came upon the church I go to with my family. Finally, I was confident that I knew where I was. Finally, I felt comfortable and safe and back in my environment. Finally, I had some peace and I wasn’t worrying. Pretty fitting I got all that from my church.
I normally pass the church on every run I take, but my training has been different this year and I hadn’t run by the church in a few months. When I finally came upon it again, it was giving me the direction I needed!
On Sunday, I went with the family for the first time since August, and the bulk of the message was about using your gifts to help others. It was centered around 1 Peter 4:10:
Each of us, as a good manager of God’s different gifts, must use for the good of others the special gift we have received from God.
I loved it. I’ve struggled a lot this year, and it’s always when I lose focus on my faith. When I stay strong, everything is always better. I had a great day with the family on Sunday and the message seemed like it was written to me.
I don’t believe in coincidence. This run was exactly what it was supposed to be. I got home before Tiff was worried. My nine miles turned into 10.25. And I hit my goal, averaging 7:56 per mile — even with those hills. I stood on my doorstep when I got home and prayed like I always do. I was grateful for the opportunity. I accomplished what I wanted to, but even if I didn’t, I knew that I was pretty fortunate to have the ability to go run like that and take it all in. I mean, who gets to do that?
I’m pretty sure than when I finish these last 10 marathons to wrap up Operation Jack, I’ll feel the same way.
Matt Wilbanks says
Great post Sam!
Mandy Kurschinske says
What a wonderful post to read!
Denise Willer says
Great blog! One of your most enjoyable reads. Thanks for sharing with us, Sam, you’re almost there! 61 finish lines!
Jeff Cate says
Quite an adventure in the dark rain and great write-up. Keep up the great running!
Audrey Price says
I’m always amazed at the way God can pull us back to him. Calling us without knowing we are heading into that direction. Great post, glad you didn’t get eaten :: ))
Rob Benefiel says
Awesome post, Sam!
Linda Altergott says
Learning to trust God through the darkness and the storms can only be accomplished through the eyes of faith. Keep going Sam, you’re being led into your promised land. Remember also, Phillipians 4:13 You can do all things through Him who gives you strength!